Goodbye Or Not?
by i like my men sparkly
Summary: During New Moon when Edward is saying goodbye to Bella, something in her breaks and she refuses do let him leave, this is their story when Edward didn't leave and Bella doesn't need Jacob. Not for Jacob Lovers
1. Chapter 1

A/N: OK guys this is my first attempt at a story, so tell me everything you think, don't hold back, I need all the help I can get. Ok so ya thanks and just review and tell me your honest opinion.

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BPOV

"You...don't...want me?" I tried out the words, confused by the way they sounded, placed in that order.

"No"

I stared, uncomprehending, into his eyes. He stared back without apology. His eyes were like topaz-hard and clear and very deep. I felt like I could see into them for miles and miles, yet nowhere in their bottomless depths could I see a contradiction to the word he'd spoken.

"Well, that changes things." I was surprised by how calm and reasonable my voice sounded. It must be because I was so numb. I couldn't realize what he was telling me. It still didn't make any sense.

He looked into the trees as he spoke again. " Of course, I'll always love you..." and there was his mistake, because once i heard those words, something in me snapped, he went on anyway as if he was beyond noticing me "...in a way. but what happened the other night made me realize that it's time for a change." and there was another mistake, he just couldn't not love me anymore, he loved me too long, and I loved him too much to give up without a fight.

"No." I said, so quietly that it was almost a whisper, but with his hearing, I'm sure he heard it just fine.

He looked up "What?" he looked confused, but that wasn't the only thing, he also looked tired, sad, and most of all, hopeful, as though he had been hoping I would say something, and was beyond happy that I did.

"I said no!" I was almost shouting now. "You are not leaving me, not after all that we have gone through together. I will admit, that when you said you didn't want me, I almost believed you...but then I remembered what you said to me at the hospital, that you would stay with me as long as it was what was good for me. And once I remembered that, I knew that this was just you and your conscience, always wanting to be the hero and save my soul." I took a step forward no, I was right in front of him only an inch away, our lips were almost touching.

He looked so relieved that I was almost taken aback, but I kept going "And I am not letting your stupid conscience talk you into leaving me!" and then I kissed him. and it felt like the i was reborn, like the world had restarted, and he kissed me back like i was the only thing that kept him on the earth! i loved him so much in that moment i thought i would burst! oh how i loved him.

EPOV

"No" she whispered, but me being what I am, I heard it clearly. That one word, those two letters, were the only resistance needed, I couldn't leave, not now.

But still, I might have just been suffering so much that I made it up I had to be sure. "what?" I asked.

"I said no!" she told me, much louder now, the feeling of happiness and relief was getting bigger. "No, you are not leaving me, not after all that we have gone through together. I will admit, that when you said you didn't want me, i almost believed you..." the feeling of shock struck me, i couldn't believe that she had almost believed me on that, that had to have been the biggest lie i have ever told in my whole long life "...but then i remembered what you said at the hospital, that you would stay with me, as long as it was what was good for me. And once i remembered that i knew that this was just you and your conscience, always wanting to be the hero and saving my soul." when she said this i almost laughed in outrage! of course i wanted, no needed to save her soul, it was one of the things that proved to me that the world was still good, even when the people in it are not "

"And I am not letting your overly talkative conscience talk you into leaving me!" she was an inch away from me, are lips were so close I could taste her. Then she did the think that I had been wanting to do for days now. She kissed me. It was the best kiss I have ever had. I kissed her back, passing my invisible line of boundaries, not caring then, what happened as long as I was with her again.

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A/N: OK so how was it, too short, too long, not well written, really, I don't care if you review to criticize my whole chapter I just want to know how it was! So tell me please. OK thank you.


	2. Chapter 2 First Punishment

A/N: Thank you all for reviewing my first chapter as it means so much to me. This is a repost, I took this story down awhile ago for personal reasons but I missed writing it, I hope you all enjoy chapter 2.

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BPOV

After I don't know how long-it could have been days or maybe just seconds-I pulled away and stared into Edward's dark and deep eyes in wonder. How is it, that a man like this could want a girl like me? I know I've thought about this around a million times but this incident made me start to think about it again. A mountain of insecurities were pushed onto me throughout my life and I don't know what to think anymore but I pushed them aside for awhile so I could be with my soul mate.

"Bella, how could I ever think to walk away from you?" He asked me, looking lovingly into my eyes.

"Oh shush, you are on probation!" I almost took a step back, my words surprising myself and I knew that they surprised him, I blushed but kept going. "I can't believe that you tried to leave me!" I almost shouted. "You said that you would never leave me and here you are trying to leave me! Well you are going to pay for that!" He grinned at me but then when he took in the seriousness of my tone, his face grew worried. I knew that he always thought of my anger as 'a kitten that think she's is a tiger' but right now I was a girl to be reckoned with. "Now come inside with me. I have to make dinner for Charlie." and with that I turned my back on him and walked down the path and out of the forest.

"Umm, what exactly should I be expecting?" He asked me softly but I could tell that there was a small smile on his face as though he were a bit amused but also a bit scared.

"Well, first you are going to help me make Charlie's dinner. Fish." I smiled at the look of discomfort and disgust which came onto his face. "But first come here" I motioned to a spot right in front of me. "Don't ever do something like that again!" I then leaned forward and kissed him, experimentally at first but when I realized he wasn't going to pull away I deepened the kiss, sliding the tip of my tongue across his bottom lip. He allowed me entry and we kissed deeply for a few minutes. I then realized that Charlie would be home soon so I had to make dinner.

"You don't have to worry about that. Just saying the words to you were very painful. I can't imagine what it would be like to live my life without you!" He told me but right now I was feeling scared, self-conscious and sensitive. I figured that after what he put me through he owed me. Let the games begin.

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Charlie's POV

That night by the time I got back home from the station, dinner was ready and on the table, yummy fish fries. Bella knows how much I love those!  
When Bella came down stairs from her room, she was fuming. Her eyes were red from crying and her face was white as if she were in shock. I only knew one thing which had happened in our little town this week to do something to her like that. The Cullen's leaving. I knew that this would have a negative effect on her but I hope that she will get better soon. I don't want my girl hurting for too long just because that Edward left. He doesn't deserve her and he knows it.

"Hey Dad, I have dinner on the table but I think I'm going to pass it up tonight. I'm not very hungry." Bella told me but as she was heading upstairs I realized that as her father I should probably have a little chat with her.

"Wait Bells, I actually wanted to talk to you about something." Okay that was a lie. I really didn't want to talk to her or to anyone right now but as a concerned father, I should do my job. She looked at me sceptically, as if she didn't believe me. I didn't believe myself. "I heard down at the station that the Cullen's are leaving town." I tried to say this as nice and softly as possible but her face got whiter still and I think her hands twitched a little as if she wanted to say or do something but thought better of it. "Now, I know that this has to be hard on you, but I want you to know that you will find someone else-"

"Oh Dad, I don't want to be mean or anything, but PLEASE tell me you are not giving me the 'there are plenty of fish in the sea speach'!" She was practically shouting now.

"You're right, it's not my place. I just want to know that you're okay." I looked at her, searching for any signs that she was taking this harder then she was letting on but all the signs seemed to point to her being fine except for maybe a little shock. I just hope that it stays that way. But she was right about me giving her that talk, I mean really I'm still obsessing over her mother who had left me, taken my only child and remarried to a much younger man. I can't talk about moving on.

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BPOV

When Charlie started talking about how I would get over Edward and how I would find someone else, I started to feel sick and I was getting that scared, sensitive feeling again. I had to get him to stop or I would start feeling as though I was being sucked into a black hole and that is just a feeling you don't want to experience twice.

So I cut him off in mid sentence "Oh Dad, I don't want to be mean or anything" Well I didn't. "But PLEASE tell me you are not giving me the 'there are plenty of fish in the sea speach'!" I shouted at him. He can't talk about moving on when he still had pictures of my mom on his walls.  
"Your right-" He kept on talking but the only words I heard were those two. After he finished, he looked me over as if to see if I was broken. He then went to the table to eat and I went back upstairs to my room and to my vampire. But first I think he deserves some punishment.

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EPOV

That night Bella was very angry with me. I understood why but that didn't mean that I wasn't upset that she wasn't talking to me.  
I heard the conversation that Charlie and Bella were having down stairs and I laughed at the disbelief there was in Bella's voice as she cut Charlie off in mid sentence. I was surprised at how angry she was at me. Okay that was a lie. No, I was surprised at how she let me know how mad she was at me. Usually she will just hide it but it was as if something inside of her had changed tonight and I'm not sure if I like it.

Bella started walking upstairs. I thought that she would come back to her room but instead she went to the bathroom.

Charlie finished eating and decided to turn in early. He fell asleep quickly. Bella still hadn't come out of the bathroom. A second later I heard the water turn on. I started to feel hot as I realized that she had forgotten to get clothes so she was going to come back in here without any clothes on. I breathed deeply, I knew she was doing this on purpose to punish me for almost leaving and I knew that I deserved some punishment but really? She was going to come into her room, naked and wet! That is just a little extreme.

I had to get my mind off of this so I started thinking about hunting but then I realized that I hadn't told my family yet that I hadn't left. But I also realized that Alice probably saw what was coming and told them what had happened. I started to wonder what had changed from the vision she saw: Me leaving Bella, not looking back or at least pretending not to look back and what actually happened. I will probably never know.

But then I stopped thinking completely because I heard the water in the shower turn off and the door of the bathroom open and then I heard her loud footsteps across the hall and she opened the door. I held my breath, not that I needed to breathe but the sight of her took the breath away from me. She was wrapped up in a towel, her hair wrapped in another towel. She wrapped it that way that all girls seem to know how to do. And she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Without looking at me once she got out her pajamas's, she dropped the towel. At that point I was beyond caring about my rules, I wasn't even sure why I had rules anymore and watched as she slowly got dressed for bed.  
Then she went back to the bathroom and brushed her teeth and hair.

When she came back to her room, she sat down on her bed and looked at me. Her look was just a little too innocent though. I'm pretty sure she wanted me to know that she did that to me to punish me but I was just beyond caring. She knew what she was doing to me, and didn't plan on doing anything about it.

Pretty soon Bella fell asleep. I was watching her, her hair was strewn across the pillow, her little red lips were slightly open and her body was sprawled across the whole bed. I started thinking about what I had almost done when I remembered that I hadn't called my family yet. I knew that Alice must have told them by now but I knew that I should still call.

I called Carlisle and he was surprised and worried that something bad had happened to me or to Bella but I was quick to reassure him that we were both okay and it was just that Bella had made me realize what an idiot I was. "Well it's about time you realized that, I've been trying to tell you that for decades now!" I heard Rose yell in the background.

"Rose, that is enough. Edward has seen the error of his ways and he is now fixing it." Carlisle told her.

"More like he is trying to fix it. Hey Jasper, how much do you wanna bet that Bella will have Edward totally whipped by the time we get home?" I heard Emmet call to Jasper.

"Are you crazy man? No way am I taking you up on that bet, it's a sure thing, he practically is already!" Jasper and Emmet laughed.

I gritted my teeth together, getting worried about what Bella would do to me again. "Okay Edward, Esme and I will figure out something so that no one gets suspicious." I blew out a long breath and nodded to myself. I was definitely lucky to have Carlisle.

"Thank you so much! I realize that I have caused a lot of trouble lately for our family and I'm sorry!" I told him truthfully.

"It's okay son. You are in love and love does crazy things to people." Carlisle answered me with understanding in his voice. "I will see you and Bella tomorrow!" He told me before hanging up. I was pretty sure I knew the reason too. I heard Rose in the background before he ended the call, yelling about the shit I had gotten our family into.

I hung my head. I was disappointed in myself! How could I do this to my family? Or to Bella? Then I realized what I had just thought to myself. I don't think of Bella as family? She thinks of herself as our family, why don't I think of her as family? I will just have to fix that but knowing Bella's aversion to early marriage, I will have to plan this perfectly…how do I do it?  
But before I could think of anything else, Bella sat up in her bed screaming.

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BPOV

I was on the verge of sleep but was still holding on to consciousness because I knew that once I fell asleep the darkness would capture me and bring me dreams of what it had felt like in the forest, the darkness, the pain and emptiness.

I still couldn't believe that I did that to Edward though! I never knew I had it in me! Something in me must have changed in that forest because the old Bella would have blushed at the very idea, not at the actual act. Edward probably didn't know this but the reason that I couldn't look at him while I was changing was because if I had he would have seen my blush and it would have ruined the whole effect.

Finally I succumbed to the drowsiness and fell into oblivion.

The dream was just as I had suspected:

I was lying on the ground but it wasn't the ground. It was air but it wasn't. I'm not exactly sure how to describe it. The best I can come up with was emptiness. And everything was dark. I could tell that I was looking at the sky but the moon and the stars were gone. It was only black. The sign was obvious: Edward had left and taken my light with him, along with my heart. Then the world went up in flames. I felt a burning like I had only felt one before, the night at the dance studio, when James had bitten my hand.

The next thing I knew, I was being held and shushed by Edward but before I could say anything he was gone and Charlie was opening my door.  
"Hey Bells, what's wrong?" He was looking around the room as if for intruders and then I saw what he was holding, a baseball bat. It was quite a sight: the chief of police standing in my door way in his boxers, swinging a baseball bat. I would have laughed but the feeling of burning was still fresh in my mind.

"I'm fine Dad, no one is in here, I just had a bad dream, that's all." I reassured him.

He nodded. "Okay, sweet dreams Bells" And he turned and closed the door behind him.

"Bella, love, are you okay?" Edward asked quietly but urgently, walking quickly out of my closet and to my bed.

"Yes Edward, I'm fine. I just had a bad dream, that's all" I smiled at him and he smiled back, his eyes shining with worry and love.

"Okay, so you want to tell me about it?" He asked, still a bit worried.

"No, I just want to go back to sleep. I actually sleep you know" I told him and stuck out my tongue at him.

He laughed quietly and said "Yes that's right. You do sleep don't you? Hmm, I'll have to remember that if i ever want to come visit you at night" He winked at me. I smiled and laid back down on my bed.

Quickly I fell asleep again, a deep dreamless sleep.

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EPOV

Bella seemed very reluctant to tell me about her nightmare. We will need to talk soon. But first I was going to watch the love of my long, long life sleep.

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A/N: I hope you enjoyed the chapter I will probably post the next one tomorrow, or tonight depending on when I get the time.


	3. Chapter 3: The Hospital

A/N: Hope you enjoy the chapter!

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BPOV  
When I woke up suddenly, it was the sound of sirens that were quickly getting louder that awoke me. I got up and looked out the window to see an ambulance speeding down our street and turning up our driveway!

"Bella! Okay, please don't interrupt as this is very important" Edward told me very quickly. "Charlie had a heart attack so I called 911 but acted like I was you so now everyone is convinced that you woke up in the middle of the night and heard Charlie cry out. You then went into his room, saw him on the ground and quickly called 911. I had to do that so that no one knew I was here." He said this all so quickly that I almost didn't understand. But I did and by the time he was done, I had tears in my eyes that were threatening to overflow. I was scared and couldn't believe that my father had, had a heart attack!

"O-okay, I'll go d-d-downstairs and act the p-part." I said, trembling with trepidation.

The door was open and people were quickly filling in. "You must be Bella. Where is your father's room?" asked a young looking paramedic. I quickly pointed him to Charlie's room and he and a few other paramedics ran in and came back with Charlie on a stretcher. "Do you want to hop in the back with your dad?" he asked. I nodded, speachless, so he just walked with me to the ambulance.

When I hopped in, they closed the doors and started speeding to the ER. The paramedic in the back was strapping Charlie down and another guy started poking an IV in him. After that I kind of just sat there and waited to get to the ER. I may have fainted, I'm not sure but maybe I just fell back asleep.

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Early the next morning I was woken up by a doctor. Under normal circumstances it would be Carlisle but since they weren't back yet, I had to settle for a different doctor. "Your father is stable but we need to keep him here for a week or two just to make sure. You can go in and see him now if you'd like but he's is sleeping" He looked at me with sadness in his eyes. I understood that even if my father was stable, he wasn't well yet. I was getting more worried by the second.

I walked into the room and looked at the bed that Charlie was lying on. He was sitting here, IV's attached to him and a heart monitor. I wonder what had caused the heart attack.

My phone rang suddenly and I looked at it, a feeling of deep relief washed over me as I saw who was calling.  
"Bella! Oh my god, are you ok? I saw it coming but I just wasn't quick enough and I thought that once Edward told you that he was leaving, you would never want to talk to me again!"

"Alice, calm down! I get that you can't know everything, OK? Charlie is stable right now but he isn't good. Please hurry back, I need my best friend!" I completely understood that Alice couldn't see everything, and a lot had happened in a day.

"I know! I think my power are a little off because of my emotions because when Edward told us we were leaving, I almost ripped his throat out but I assume that you did that for me?" she asked giggling. I smiled and for a second I forgot about all the craziness that was happening but then looked over to my dad and the happiness was gone when I saw him lying on a hospital bed attached to a heart monitor and a bunch of other things.  
"Alice-" She cut me off short, knowing what I was going to say.

"Don't worry. Carlisle is on his way and if anyone can save your dad, it's him and you know that!" She told me.

"I know, I'm just so worried. I wonder what caused the heart attack?" I said.

"Oh I think I can answer that for you. Your Dad heard you talking to Edward and because Edward was focused on you, he didn't see or hear Charlie walking down the hallway and looking in the door. He saw Edward with you and the shock gave him a heart attack!"

Wow! I can't believe it! And to think that if Edward really had left then all this never would have happened. Charlie would be good and healthy but I wouldn't be. I knew that if Edward had left, I would have been worse than dead. I was having a war with myself. Which would be better? If Edward had left or that he had stayed? I just didn't know, and thinking about it was going to kill me, I had to stop.

I was so worried about Charlie. "Wow! That's crazy. How long until Carlisle gets here?" I asked her, getting increasingly more worried by the minute.  
"He should only be 2 hours or so. He will be there soon. We have already made up a reason that we are back and don't worry, Charlie will be fine, I promise." Considering that she was a psychic, that promise meant a lot to me. I just hoped that she was right.

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EPOV  
After Bella fell asleep again, I got up to call Alice when I heard a noise. Charlie. He was crying out. I ran as fast as I could down the hall and there I saw Charlie on the ground, his hands clutching his chest, gasping for air.

I got my phone out and dialed 911. "This is 911, what is your emergency?" A lady answered the phone.

I remembered that I wasn't supposed to be here so I pretend to be Bella "This is Bella Swan. My father Charlie is having a heart attack!" I said in an imitation of Bella's voice, which was pretty easy to imitate which was not that surprising since I spend every moment of my life thinking about that voice.

"An ambulance in on the way. Please keep calm and open your door." She said. I replied okay and waited for her to hang up, extremely thankful that everyone in the town knows where Charlie lives.

Then, I ran back to Bella's room and woke her up. "Bella! Okay please don't interrupt as this is very important…" I kept going on, knowing that I had her full attention. I also knew she must be so worried about Charlie so I tried to calm her down but didn't have much time as the ambulance was almost there.

I had to leave before they got here as I wasn't supposed to be here anymore and I had to call Carlisle and ask him if he had thought up a plan so that we can move back here. But mostly I was worried about Bella. All of this happening in the same day, gosh, that has to be hard on her.  
I called Carlisle "Have you thought up an excuse yet so that you can move back here?" I asked him in a hurry to know the answer.

"Yes, Esme decided that she would miss the perks of a small town life style and decided that she didn't even want to try a new life in the city as it's too much work. What do you think?" He asked me, worried that it wasn't believable enough.

"It will have to do. Charlie just had a heart attack and we need you down at the hospital. Bella is frightened to death and I'm not much use right now." I told him in a rush, knowing that any human listening wouldn't be able to hear a word.

"I'm on my way now. Calm down Bella but don't show your face. People think that you moved with us and you shouldn't be there yet." He told me sternly but seemed really worried about Charlie and Bella. I was too.

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A/N: Ok that is it for today, I know it was short and probably not very well written, and I would love to hear your response to it, just review. I have been thinking that maybe I should make my chapters shorter, I would be updating more fi they were shorter, what do you all think, long and far apart, or short and updated faster, please review.


	4. Chapter 4: Poor Charlie!

A/N: I'v always wondered why people put stuff like 'I'm not stephanie Meyer' or 'I don't own any characters' stuff like that because I'v just always thought it was kinda obvious that you don't own the characters that someone else created, or that your not an award wining author… but thats just me.  
Anyway, Hope you like the chapter!

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BPOV

"Doctor Carlisle is here to see the patient himself, Miss Swan." A nurse came in and told me before walking back out just as Carlisle came in.  
He looked concerned once he walked in went right to checking over Charlie's heart rate record. After that he looked at a clipboard that was hanging at the end of the bed and nodded his head slowly. Then he turned, walked over and looked at me. I don't know what he was searching for but he must have found it because he then took a step forward and hugged me.

Hugging Carlisle wasn't awkward at all, not like I expected it to be. Actually it was easier then hugging Charlie as though Carlisle was my father and in a way he was. He is here now and he is always there when I need him. "Bella-" He stopped as though he thought better of what he was saying. Then he said, "Bella, do you need some coffee?" No 'are you okay's' or 'how are you feeling'. No, it was better and he knew that a hundred other people had already asked me that so instead he just asked me a simple question which meant the world to me.

"Yes please!" I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding and smiled for the first time in hours.

He laughed and put his hand on my elbow, steering me to the cafeteria. I realized that he hadn't told me anything about my father yet and although I hated to ruin my good mood, Charlie's health is the most important thing right now and I realized that if Charlie was fine then he would have already told me. There must be something wrong.

"Okay Carlisle, I have my coffee and I'm sitting down so now please tell me what is wrong?" I asked, hoping to get it over with quickly.  
"Look Bella, your father is under a lot of stress. With being the chief of police and you being here now. Even though that has also helped his happiness, he worries about you as bear sightings that have been reported and you could get hurt. Right now the best thing for him is to get off his feet and relax while having you not get in any trouble." He told me and I sighed with relief. That I could do.

"Okay, is that all?" I asked, starting to calm down.

"One more thing." I nodded waiting. "Make sure that Edward is paying attention to where Charlie is from now on. Another scare like that and he could be in a lot worse of a condition." I smiled slightly but also nodded. "I'll remind Edward of that the next time I see him. "Oh and no more waking up in the middle of the night screaming. That kind of thing can give a vampire a heart attack!" I giggled. "Come to think of it, that might be a good thing…" he trailed off and smirked at me.

Wow! Carlisle was acting a lot different then I have ever seen him. He seemed a lot more carefree. Well I suppose it can be hard running a household of vampires that don't really do what they are supposed to.

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EPOV

Carlisle was back, that's a good thing. Hopefully he can do something for Charlie and Bella. Hopefully he can help me with the guilt I am feeling.  
It's all my fault of course, everything is. My family moving, Bella having nightmares, my family moving back, James almost killing Bella and the newest on the list; Charlie having a heart attack!

If I had just been watching and listening like I was supposed to, none of this would have happened. The irony of it is that if I had left, Charlie would have never had a heart attack in the first place but I can't bring myself to feel guilty about not leaving although I do feel immensely guilty about not listening closely enough.

"Bella! I'm so sorry! How is he? How are you?" I asked her as I entered the hospital room.

My love looked so tired. I doubt she has gotten more then two hours sleep since it happened 2 days ago.

"I'm okay Edward, just tired. Charlie is okay, he is just stressed and why are you sorry? You better not be blaming yourself for something that is my fault again!" I stared at her in disbelief. How could she think this was her fault?

"Oh come on Edward" she said exasperatedly. "If I hadn't screamed and woken Charlie up, we wouldn't be here, Charlie would be fine and I would be sleeping soundlessly in my bed right now!" She almost yelled but then quieted down when a nurse walked in and shushed her while checking Charlie's temperature and blood pressure.

I just stood there looking at her in amazement. Of course she would find someway to blame this on herself! "Bella! The last time I checked-which I will admit was about a century ago but I don't think the rules have changed-you can't control your dreams!"

My voice started rising too but I quickly quieted down before the nurse could shush me too. I looked into her mind and heard '_so loud. What are they trying to do? Wake the dead? I should set them straight but ooh look at him, oh a hot piece if I've ever saw one! Stop that! He is much too young for you and look, he is comforting that girl over there. They are probably dating and of course there is the fact that he is Doctor Cullen's son, there is always that_' Her voice was rambling on but I stopped listening, getting annoyed with the shallowness of people these days. Don't they ever look on the inside of people anymore? Does anything matter besides the physical appearance of people anymore?

I stopped when I realized that I was rambling on inside my head. "I know, but I didn't have to scream now did I?" she asked me. I sighed, knowing that I would never win this fight as my lamb was just too stubborn.

"All I'm saying is to stop blaming yourself for every little thing that happens and Carlisle said that you should go home and get some rest so come on. We are going to my house now." She nodded in defeat and followed me out of the room but before we left she went over to Charlie and kissed him on the forehead. I smiled at this kind gesture, sure that she would never do it if he were awake.

As we left, I wrapped my arm around her waist and kissed the top of her head, breathing in the scent that burned in my throat.

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Charlie POV

I lied there in my hospital bed, knowing that in the same room with me was my daughter worried sick but I couldn't seem to open my eyes.  
There was something that I had forgotten, something missing from my memory, the thing that had caused my heart attack. But what was it? What was I missing? I couldn't remember.

By the next morning I had completely forgotten about my thoughts of my lost memory. The memory was lost forever it seems. Forever gone.

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BPOV

When we entered the Cullen household, I smiled as I saw all the lights on, the TV turned down to almost mute, Emmett sitting on the couch, flipping through countless channels, Rose in the bathroom, brushing out the smooth, golden strands of her perfect wavy hair with the door open and Alice walking down the stairs, trailed by Jasper. They both smiled at me with Jasper keeping more distance then usual and Alice bounding over to me.  
"Bella!" she almost screamed. Esme walking out of the kitchen, shushed her and smiled warmly at me. She then walked over and hugged me, kissing my cheek and then backed up and sat down on the couch next to Emmett. "Look at the dark circles under your eyes! Have you been sleeping at all?" she asked me sternly.

I shook my head "No, the night of Charlie's accident, I woke up in the middle of the night and since then I haven't been able to sleep more then a few hours at a time." I told the room at large.

Jasper made a whimpering sound and as we all looked over at him he explained. "It's the pain that you're in Bella. The worry and fright that you have practically falling off of you and the pain you are feeling. Why are you feeling pain and guilt?" He asked me.

Everyone looked over at me and I rushed out an explanation as fast as I could. "Well I'm worried and frightened for Charlie mostly but also because I'm scared that Edward will try to leave again, the pain is from Edward trying to leave me and the guilt is because it is all my fault!"

Everyone stared at me and then looked at Edward with angry faces, then to me again. "Bella, do you want me to beat him up for you for trying to leave? I will do it with PLEASURE!" Emmet told me. I giggled a little at that broke the tension in the room.

"What do you think is your fault Bella?" Esme asked me, looking concerned and disapproving and over all momish.

"Everything! The birthday accident-" I was cut off by Jasper and Edward both giving low growls to that statement.

"Bella, that was my fault!" Edward, Jasper and Alice all said at the same time. We all looked at Alice, feeling confused.

"Well, what kind of psychic am I? I didn't even see any of this coming. If I had just seen that little paper cut then all of this could have been prevented!" Alice yelled and pouted when we all looked at her as if she were crazy.

"No, it was my fault!" Jasper said. Okay, I will admit that his guilt actually made sense even if it wasn't reasonable. "I should be able to control myself! I mean, really one drop of blood and I almost ruin what our family built in this town!" I shook my head no and looked at Edward.

"This is all my fault!" I rolled my eyes along with Jasper, Rose, Emmett, Alice and even Esme. We had all heard his guilt talk before. "One drop of blood and we could have handled that but I had to push you into that glass! Oh, all the glass and blood! This was obviously my fault!" I rolled my eyes.

Now I cleared my throat. "Okay, now can I speak? Okay, thank you!" I heard Emmett chuckle by the couch. "All your guilt is stupid. Alice yours is just annoying, Jasper you did nothing wrong! And Edward you are just trying to find another thing to blame yourself for! STOP! Okay, just stop! This is my fault because I was the one who got the paper cut and I was the one who started bleeding in a house full of vampires. Only I could find some way to make the Cullen family almost overload. This was my fault so stop blaming yourselves!" I took a deep breath.

Edward was beside me with his eyes closed, pinching the bridge of his nose and Jasper was across the room, looking down guiltily and Alice just looked pissed because I called her guilt stupid.

The home phone started ringing and just before Edward picked it up Alice said, "It's for Bella" Edward picked it up and gave it to me.

"Hello" I said into the phone.

"Bella, It's Carlisle. Your father has gone into a coma and you should come down here now, but don't worry too much, the coma shouldn't last more then a few days. Maybe a week and he should be fine." I was shocked so then I just hung up the phone and was dragged into Edward's Volvo and we were off.

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Charlie POV

I can almost hear. It's like I know that there are noises but I don't know what they are and I can almost move. It's like I know the motions but can't seem to do them. I can't open my eyes and it is agonizing knowing that Bella is just on the other side of the eyelids but I can't move them!  
Bella. She must be so worried. I tried to remember for the thousandth time why I was lying here in a bed but just like every other time, after a moment the memory of the question was gone and I can't hold on to anything any more. I was scared.

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Alice POV

I can't see!

I didn't see!

I couldn't see!

Why can't I see? What is impairing my vision? It's like something is there that is blackening it. I know that I can see vampires the best because I am one and I can see humans well because I was one and maybe it is another breed that I have never been. Maybe I'll ask Carlisle if another breed of monsters lives around here. I wonder. I know that the werewolves used to live here but they died out years ago. What could it be? Why can't I see?

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BPOV

A coma?  
I can't believe my dad is in a coma! Luckily Carlisle says it will only last for a few days but I'm scared. What if something happens and I lose him? I don't know what I will do. But what I do know is that I'm not moving back in with my mother. No, I'm staying here. I know I am. Whatever happens, I'm staying.

Edward walked in carrying a cup of coffee for me. How sweet! "Bella, I know you didn't get any sleep like you were supposed to so I brought you this." He handed it to me and tried to give me my favorite crooked smile but it was marred by worry. Even Edward was worried. What do I do? Edward is my rock. If he does not know what to do, I am going to crash and burn!

It's all going to be okay.

Today Charlie woke up from his coma. He was only in it for two days. When he woke up, the first thing he did was ask for me. I was at the Cullen's house, sleeping so I got a call and came speeding back here, the place I had been for the last four days! I am really starting to get sick of the hospital. Hopefully if I get into any accidents—correction: when I get into an accident-Carlisle can just fix me up at the Cullen's house.

Once I got home from the hospital with Charlie on my side-he went against medical advise and chose to leave the hospital before getting the OK from Carlisle. But that's Charlie for you, so stubborn. I cooked him some dinner and went straight to sleep. Edward was in my room when I got upstairs but I was too tired to really communicate so I just went straight to bed.

I was too tired to have any dreams that night. Luckily. Hopefully the nightmare I had was just a one-time thing. Edward sure hopes so and so do I. Or maybe it was my unconscious telling me that something bad was about to happen. In which case I really hope it was just a one-time thing. I shared this idea with Edward but he quickly calmed me down and told me not to be silly, that it was just because of the traumatic day that I had gone though. But I knew Edward too well to not see the worry in his eyes.

I just hoped that his words were correct and I was just being silly.

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A/N: As I say every time I write a new chapter, please review, if you have any criticism, Idea's, or umm I don't know, anything really…just tell me. Review!


	5. Chapter 5 Part 1

A/N: Hope you like the chapter!  
Chapter 5 (Part 1) EPOV

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Bella told me her theory of the nightmare she had. I tried to calm her down by saying it was silly, that it was just a reaction to the long day she had. I winced internally at the reminder of it being me who had caused her such a long day. As I watched Bella, I realized that I had to go hunting soon so I dropped out of the window and went into the forest where I met Alice. Stupid psychic! She then bounced up to me and smiled.

"Edward, something good is going to happen. I saw it!" I tried to sneak into her mind but as usual she was blocking me by singing "Baby" by Justin Bieber. Ah!

"What is it?" I sighed, knowing that she wasn't going to tell me.

"You'll just have to wait and see!" She giggled and then flew off into the forest, thinking in her mind Race ya!

I quickly followed after her, beating her to the closest deer. I drank quickly as I wanted to get back to Bella soon.

"Edward, slow down. I don't see anything happening in the next hour so you can stop worrying!"

Of course she knew that I couldn't stop. It wasn't in my nature. As I started hunting for the next deer, I thought about Bella as usual but this time I was thinking about Bella in a white dress and walking down an aisle with music playing in the background. The picture would have brought tears of joy to my eyes if I were human. Now it made my unnecessary breath hitch. Alice turned to me with the biggest grin on her face. She saw it! I knew it! It was going to happen!

"Edward please let me plan it! PLEASE! I promise I won't go TOO overboard! It will be amazing and Bella will thank me when she gets older. I just know it! And you will be so happy with it! Oh and Esme will have so much fun planning it with me! You can't deny me this Edward!

PLEASE?" She asked me so fast that even I could barely understand her. I grinned. Yes, it would happen! My smile got bigger.

"Alice, you know it's not up to me. Bella is the one who will make the final decision. She still has to say yes to my proposal anyway" I couldn't stop smiling. If Alice saw it then that meant that it was almost positive that it would happen.

"You know she will Edward. Bella doesn't care about herself and if it makes you happy she will do it and this will make you ecstatic!" She then started thinking about dress designs in her head. My smile faltered. Would Bella only say yes because I wanted her to? Did she even care about it? Does she really want it? How can I tell? What do I do?

"Oh no Edward, you are not over thinking this. You always over think everything! It makes everything worse and a lot less fun! Just do what your heart tells you!" Alice was bouncing now but also looking sternly at me, knowing what I was thinking and to think I'M the mind reader!

"Okay Alice, if you say so" I rolled my eyes. I hunted one more deer and then I was on my way to my angel.

"Don't worry about it!" She called after me. In her head she was thinking 'I'm the only one that should be worrying.I have to pick out everything!' But I knew she didn't mind at all. In fact she was so happy about it that she was vibrating. Good luck Jasper! When I got back Bella was still asleep, breathing peacefully in and out. I smiled at her and then walked over to her bed. I wanted to take her hand but I thought my cold hand might wake her if I touched her so I was content with just sitting there and staring at her beauty. Her hair was all over the pillow and across her face. I pushed it away from her face and she moved slightly but then fell back asleep. Her lips were parted slightly and her legs were bundled up as if she were cold. I went and got her another blanket and she fell into a deeper sleep.

"Edward…. need you…don't go…. love you…" Bella was talking in her sleep as usual. I frowned, hearing the words she was saying. She still thinks I might leave. She didn't understand that I was powerless now; that I could barely make my self leave before. Now I couldn't even think about it. How can I prove it to her? How? I started planning just how I would propose to her but then realized that I should probably wait. I mean we are still in high school. Well at least she is and she is only 18 years old plus there is her aversion to marriage so that may be a problem….

The sun was starting to show today which was a good thing as it was Saturday. I didn't want to leave Bella right now. Hmm, I haven't taken her to our meadow in a long time. We should probably go there today. Should I propose then? No, I should probably wait until her father's heart attack scare wears off. She was breathing and her heart rate was accelerating. I could tell it was only a matter of time before she woke up.

"Edward?" she asked quietly. I walked over to her bed and took her hand.

"I'm here, love" I told her gently. "I was wonder-" But I was cut off mid-sentence by the sound of her voice

"You left" She said softly, looking crest fallen and touching the skin beside my eyes, showing me that she could tell that they were lighter.

"I had to love. I needed to go hunting and talk with Alice" I explained to her as I didn't want her to get upset over nothing. "I didn't miss anything though so don't worry." I chuckled at the blush creeping onto her face.

"What did I say?" She asked the old question, her face getting darker by the minute.

"You said that you loved me…" She looked relieved at first but soon realized that I wasn't done. "You also said for me not to leave and that you needed me." I smiled at her sadly. I leaned in and then kissed her pink cheek.

"You already knew that." She said softly, repeating the words that she said a year ago.

"Still, it's nice to hear" I played along but then grew more serious. "You know that I need you even more then you need me. You also know I'm not leaving." I said sternly. She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes. "What's wrong, love?" I took her face in my hands and ran my hands through her soft hair, her smell circling around me but although I still felt the burn, I just didn't care anymore.

"I know that you said that you can't leave me…. that you won't…but I can't help but remember that time in the hospital…." We both flinched at the memory of why she was in the hospital in the first place. "You told me then that you wouldn't leave me and you did so what am I supposed to think Edward?" Her face right then was so beautifully heart broken that it took my breath away. I needed to kiss her. I leaned into her and right before my lips touched hers, I told her softly. "Believe" Then my lips came crashing down on hers and it was the sweetest kiss that I could ever remember sharing with her and I never wanted it to end but humans needed to breathe. I had to remind myself of that. When I broke away from her, my lips traveled down her jaw and to her neck and I could hear her heart and pulse racing. Her breathing was erratic and she was gasping for air. I had to admit that I was a little breathless too.

"Wh… what were you saying?" she asked slowly as though she couldn't think straight and I loved the effect I had on her.

"I was wondering if you wanted to go to our meadow today?" I smiled at her as her eyes shone with the prospect of going back there. I was really starting to wonder why I hadn't brought her back there in so long when she abruptly got up. I looked at her questioningly.

"Human moment. Don't move." She smiled as she remembered the first time she said this. I sat perfectly still just as before. When she got back, she smiled seeing that I hadn't moved and motioned for me to follow her downstairs. "Charlie is staying home today but he should still be sleeping…" She used an off hand voice, looking at me questioningly and I nodded yes. I could hear Charlie snoring from the next room and I was getting the gist of his dream. It had something to do with Bella's mother Renee and Sue Clearwater. Interesting. She then walked downstairs and got out some milk and cereal. It all looked and smelt disgusting to me but I tried to not let it show on my face but she wasn't fooled. She smiled at me, stuck out her tongue at me and then sat down and started eating.

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BELLA'S POV

Edward and I decided that we would stop at his house before going to our meadow but I was a little hesitant to go what with Charlie still not feeling well and everything but he insisted that I was to leave so we were driving to Edwards house or should I say that I was driving to Edward house and Edward was getting very impatient with me and my car, again trying to convince me to get a new car but I was still being just as stubborn. I loved this car because it had character. I tried to convince Edward of this but he just didn't listen. When we stopped at his house, we heard Emmett laughing very hard about something that seemed to annoy Edward greatly. I couldn't wait to find out.

"Belly!" Emmett called out to me as we walked in, coming up and squeezing me. I was gasping for air by the time Edward made him let me go. "Your here! Now you can settle an argument that Jasper and I are having. He thinks that Edward will wait until you are a vamp before you 'do it' but I think Edward is just chicken and doesn't know how to 'do it'. So which one is it?" Emmett looked at me expectantly with Jasper who had laughter in his eyes and Edward as though I was the only thing that could save him.

"Well Emmett, I'm wondering why you care if Edward can 'Do it'" I used air quotes. "Are you and Edward doing something that I should know about?" I asked him. He looked at me for a second as if he couldn't believe that I had actually said that and then he was rolling on the floor, laughing. Jasper was wiping a fake tear out of his eye, whispering something that sounded like "So proud…" And Edward just had a shocked expression on his face. I was laughing at everything. Emmett stood up and engulfed me in another one of his famous bear hugs.

"Oh Bella, I love you more and more every day." Emmett said, chuckling. I giggled and blushed.

"Okay, I think it's time for us to go." Edward said, grabbing a coat and a picnic basket for me. We then left, this time taking his Volvo. The car had a comfortable silence in it as though nothing had to be said. A little before we got there Edward turned to me with smile on his face, shaking his head "I still can't believe you said that to Emmett! He was so surprised when you said it that he actually thought he miss heard!"

I laughed and crossed my arms smugly. "Well, I wanted a creative way to tell him to go fuck himself so I just decided to ask him if you were fucking him." I explained calmly as though it made perfect sense.

Edward looked at me in shock, probably because of my swearing, I don't usually swear but sometimes it's fun to shock Edward, I get to do it so little these days. He should get used to it though, he still has a lot of punishment to get though before he is in my good books again, at least thats what I'm telling him.

Once we were at the pavement end, we got out and I put on my jacket. Edward then told me to hop on his back and we were off. It seemed like only yesterday that running with him made me feel sick to my stomach. Now that seemed silly and nothing I did with him made me feel sick. When we got to our meadow, I jumped off his back but knew that something was wrong. Edward stiffened and his phone rang. He picked it up and spoke into it quickly. Then he took me in his arms and told me.

"That was Alice, her vision of us has gone completely bank and she is worried, looks like we are going to have to cut this trip short, were going back." I nodded and just as I was about to hop back onto Edwards back he stiffened and turned toward the other side of the meadow. "Wolves." He said, so low that I wasn't sure I was supposed to hear it.

"What?" I asked very confused. But before Edward could answer a pack of monstrous wolves walked out of the forest and into the clearing. They stood there, at least a dozen of them, probably more. They stood there looking at us, finally the largest one, in the front of the pack padded a little closer to us and looked at me and then Edward.

Edward sighed and said. "Hello Sam, I'm Edward Cullen."

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A/N: Ok so what did you think? Just as I promised, no Jacob in the story yet, although I might have to add him in a bit, just so it's realistic and not like he dropped off the face of the earth…all though that does sound nice! Ok REVIEW as I always say. See you soon!


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